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100 Worst Songs Ever -- Part Two of Five

80
'My Humps'
Girls, if you're gonna sing about your special parts, try to make the song as pretty as the subject, huh?
Black Eyed Peas Monkey Business
79
'The Hamster Dance Song'
Roger Miller and Hampton, Dixie, Hado & Fuzzy
This annoying-on-purpose, chipmunks-on-speed bit of nonsense was the grandfather of today's "Rickroll."
Hampton The Hamster The Hamster Dance Song
78
'Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Ole Oak Tree'
Tony Orlando and Dawn
We love brave American soldiers. So much so, we think they deserve much better than this upon their return.
Tony Orlando & Dawn Definitive Collection
77
'Butterfly'
Think you like this? Sure you don't really like the song where it came from better? Without all the yapping?
Crazy Town The Gift Of Game
76
'Electric Boogie'
If it's really electric, can we throw this song, and everybody involved in its creation, into some water?
Marcia Griffiths Carousel
75
'Break My Stride'
Thankfully, something did break his stride. (Well, sorta.. truthfully, he's a very successful producer now.)
Matthew Wilder I Don't Speak the Language
74
'Do They Know It's Christmas?'
This song proves once and for all that the road to musical hell is paved with the best of intentions.
Band Aid Do They Know It's Christmas
73
'Tootsee Roll'
Not only does their band name include "69," and a "Z" in place of an "S," but also the song compares women to food.
69 Boyz Nineteen Ninety Quad
72
'(Can't Live Without Your) Love and Affection'
They could have spent more time rehearsing or writing good songs, but, hey, that hair's not gonna comb itself!
Nelson After The Rain
71
'Puttin' on the Ritz'
If this is how this guy pays tribute to his hero Irving Berlin, I'd hate to see how he treats his enemies.
Taco After Eight
70
'The Lady in Red'
Unlike most guys, he remembers what his wife wore when they met. So? At least those fellas don't write crap songs.
Chris DeBurgh Into The Light
69
'Liquid Dreams'
We had a contest as to who could listen to this the most times? The winner lasted 38 seconds. Oh, and he's deaf.
O-Town O-Town
68
'Hold My Hand'
C'mon, it's not their fault we overindulged on this one. If you eat too much cake, don't blame the baker.
Hootie & The Blowfish Cracked Rear View
67
'Rumors'
With all the stories buzzing around her now, this song can almost be seen as prophetic. Oh, wait ... pa-thetic.
Lindsay Lohan Speak
66
'How Bizarre'
There's lots of weird things in this wild world of ours. This song being on this list? Not bizarre in the least.
OMC How Bizarre
65
'Whoomp! (There It Is)'
From our 1993 journal: "It's clear this is just the start for Tag Team. Also, handheld computing is here!"
Tag Team Whoomp There It Is
64
'Breakfast at Tiffany's'
... and they went on to live together in love for many long decades, all based on that one overrated movie ...
Deep Blue Something Home
63
'Seasons in the Sun'
New T-shirt slogan: "He had joy, he had fun, he had seasons in the sun, and all we got was this lousy song."
Terry Jacks Seasons In The Sun
62
'Supermodel (You Better Work)'
Go ahead, laugh. The joke's all on us poor, uptight suckers with just one type of clothes in our closets.
RuPaul Supermodel To The World
61
'Walk the Dinosaur'
Look out! Meteor! Boom! Boom! Aka-lacka-lacka-boom! This song is knocked into extinction. Our ears are saved!
Was (Not Was) What Up, Dog?


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